10 Things to Remember This Coming Holiday Season

  1. If you don’t like Christmas music, don’t listen to it. No one is forcing you to (unless you work somewhere that it’s played all the time). If someone is enjoying it, though, don’t shit on their party.
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  2. Let people enjoy things. If someone wants to watch Christmas movies or decorate or have Christmas in their heart before Thanksgiving – leave them alone. They aren’t hurting you or impeding on your right to not celebrate it until after Turkey Day.
  3. People who have the Christmas spirit before Thanksgiving aren’t “skipping”, “disrespecting”, or “ignoring” Thanksgiving. We can play Christmas carols and enjoy some green bean casserole. Besides, we’re the only country that celebrates Thanksgiving in November and even then, a lot of people in this country don’t observe it because of the historical implications and the current climate and attitude toward indigenous peoples even in 2018.
  4. You don’t have to justify eating a big holiday meal, dessert, or treats. You also don’t have to diet for it or workout extra hard afterwards. You’re allowed to enjoy food and family and friends.
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  5. If you experience disordered eating, it’s okay if you need to bow out of holiday festivities to avoid a relapse. It’s also okay to talk to someone about what’s going on or to bring your own food if necessary. Same goes for diet restrictions or other dietary needs.
  6. Stop saying stupid stuff like, “Calories don’t count during Christmas” or “get your fat pants ready”. Calories always count, obviously, but it’s okay to not count them. Also, all my pants are fat pants, because I’m fat. Eating lots of food for one meal might make you bloated, but it doesn’t make you fat. Maybe instead we could say, “Get your stretchy pants ready”? Yeah, that’s what I’m gonna say.
  7. Holidays can get overwhelming, especially if you have anxiety and/or are introverted. You don’t have to go to every single holiday party or activity or event. Prioritize the ones you feel are most important, and if you feel like going to the other ones, do it! If you can’t, don’t force yourself. Do what you can and be kind to yourself.
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  8. If you don’t have a good relationship with your family, you aren’t required to see them during the holidays. Spend time with people who love and care about you and treat you with the kindness and respect you deserve. Your family is who you decide; whether they’re related to you or not.
  9. Quit acting offended when someone says “Happy Holidays” instead of “Merry Christmas”. They don’t know what holiday you celebrate. There are plenty of other things to be actually offended by. Besides, if they’re a cashier saying it, it might be company policy that they’re only allowed to say happy holidays and you getting mad at them doesn’t do anything but ruin their day over a rule that they can’t change and might think is silly, too. Retail workers have it hard as it is. Don’t make it worse.
  10. Speaking of retail workers – they don’t control the prices. They don’t control the sales. They don’t control the fact that your coupon expired two weeks ago or doesn’t work on the one particular item you came in to buy and you just failed to read the fine print. Standing for 4-8 hours, sometimes without a break in a high-energy environment where you’re constantly have to be “on” is fucking hard. They’re human. Have some compassion and a little patience.
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I hope you all have a happy holiday season and as Ellen says, “Be kind to one another”.

Love,
Angel

 

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No is a complete sentence.

I’ve gotten myself into so many tough spots because I didn’t want to say no to someone. Not because I didn’t feel like I was allowed to or because I was afraid of what would happen if I did, but because I didn’t want to let someone down. I didn’t want to hurt their feelings or disappoint them. But then, when I agreed to something that I couldn’t follow through with, I actually did let them down, and I became anxious about it and distraught. Continue reading “No is a complete sentence.”

Why I Deleted Facebook from My Phone

I did it. It happened the day after the school shooting in Florida. I found myself getting into arguments with people about stupid things and I noticed my anxiety getting higher and my threshold for bullshit getting lower. I knew what I needed to do, thanks to the encouragement of my best friend, and I did it.

Here’s what I learned. Continue reading “Why I Deleted Facebook from My Phone”

The Problem with Winter Isolation

I’ve got a running theme about being alone and getting out of the house, lately, and this post will be no different. When I was explaining to Shane my ideas for the last post, he reminded me of this video where the guy stayed in his apartment with absolutely zero human contact. It’s called The Loneliness Project, and it’s actually a “campaign to end loneliness” about giving older people friendship and helping them to not feel isolated. If you haven’t seen it, you should. It’s very eye-opening and a bit shocking, and honestly, it feels a bit extreme. I mean, who honestly stays in their house with no contact with the outside world; not even a cell phone?

Truthfully, a lot of people. Whether they don’t have a phone, or are just not looking at theirs, it can get so so easy to let yourself start hiding, and then not want to come out of it. Especially for those who suffer from anxiety and depression. It’s not that you want to feel isolated; you just can’t physically make yourself get out of bed, much less out of the house. Continue reading “The Problem with Winter Isolation”

Things People with Anxiety Should Do Alone

If you suffer from anxiety, you know how easy it is to just let others dictate the day/outings/etc. You want to please others because you want to make sure they want to hang out with you still. Well, first, let me just tell you, they’ll still love you and want to be around you even if you choose an activity or restaurant that they hadn’t initially thought of. Second, sometimes it’s important to do things alone so you don’t feel the burden of worrying about everyone else’s immediate happiness, sometimes at the sacrifice of your own.  Continue reading “Things People with Anxiety Should Do Alone”